


Now Having Survived

by Sacramental_Wine



Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Prize Fic, phantom limb syndrome
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-09
Updated: 2017-09-09
Packaged: 2018-12-25 12:40:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,010
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12036075
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sacramental_Wine/pseuds/Sacramental_Wine
Summary: "The thing about losing a limb violently was that it tended to leave an impression on the mind, no matter the time that had passed in between. And that was what ended up making Jamie crawl out of his room on the Overwatch base and into the halls at night, rubbing absently at the air where his prosthetic arm would normally be."





	Now Having Survived

**Author's Note:**

> This fic was the first prize in my 200+ follower Give Away on tumblr for toastedaussie. Go check them out!

The thing about losing a limb violently was that it tended to leave an impression on the mind, no matter the time that had passed in between. And that was what ended up making Jamie crawl out of his room on the Overwatch base and into the halls at night, rubbing absently at the air where his prosthetic arm would normally be. It was too painful to wear right now, his brain screaming at the  _ wrongness _ of feeling metal on a joint that hadn’t fully been flesh in almost six years but a walkabout would clear it right up. Probably. 

Back in the Outback he never really dealt with it often, too busy running around and blowing things up and getting into trouble to really take the time to feel it. He limped forward on his pegleg, looking around the unfamiliar hallways. There was so much  _ downtime _ here, and they’d given him a workshop, plenty of scrap and things to tinker with but the pain was making it hard to focus on anything  _ but _ the pain. Jamie ran his remaining hand through his hair, gripping it as a wave stung through him, reminding him of the day the arm departed his body, the shock radiating through his right side like cracking ice. He leaned on the wall for a minute, manic energy mixing with the pain to make him giggle a little, pushing himself back up as he jogged along. 

He was still getting used to food being available at any time he wanted, why not go raid the kitchen for a midnight snack? That would get his mind off of it. 

Jamie kept clunking along, each smack of the peg on the metal floor making jolting shocks go through his thigh bone to bury deeply in his skinny hip. 

After getting more than a little lost he walked into the kitchen just to see the tin can, the one that was part human, perched on a counter with a cup of tea in his hand. Jamie wrinkled his nose, wondering if the ninja noticed him yet and realized a few things. 

One, Genji wasn’t wearing his helmet and had green hair under there along with a pretty scarred up human face and neck. Two, the oversized shirt the ninja was wearing was clearly stolen since it draped over his smaller frame and made him drown in it. And three, he was looking right at him. 

Wait.

“Oi, what are you staring at?” Jamie snapped, feeling a mix of irritation and appreciation in himself as Genji just smiled placidly. It was infuriating almost, how calm he always seemed, like nothing could ruffle him, just like the rust bucket he was always trailing after like a puppy. And Jamie had  _ definitely _ tried to ruffle the ninja, trying for a reaction out of habit and he usually got nothing. Genji always seemed to laugh it off or ignore it or wave away any harsh words. Save for one memorable time where Jamie had tried to needle his master and that han ended up with the cyborg straight up shoving him off his feet, planting one small foot on his chest and growling down at him to back off. No one would ever, ever get Jamie to admit that he’d been...more than a little excited by the tone in his voice. 

It didn’t escape Jamie how tired Genji looked in this moment though. Not the spitfire he was during the day or the zen warrior he presented himself as, but just tired. 

“I apologize, Junkrat-san,” Genji said softly, fingers wrapped around the mug peeking from under the sleeves of an old flannel shirt that Jamie was willing to put money on the fact that it belonged to McCree. Jamie wasn’t dumb or deaf, he knew Genji had a habit of making off with everyone’s clothes at some point or another. He was both offended and relieved that it had never happened to him or Roadie. “I did not mean to stare, it is simply unusual for me to have company so late in the evening.”

Jamie clicked his tongue before walking to the fridge and digging through it. “Yeah well, just keep your eyes to yourself, tin can, ya might give me somethin’,” he giggled a little at the idea, wincing as he dug through the fridge. But he could feel it, Genji was watching still. When he pulled out a large assortment of cheese sticks and sat at the table, he knew those eyes were on him and he turned to look as well. Genji had one leg pulled up on the counter, the other dangling, giving glimpses of his thighs and it was weird to see him dressed. 

“What has ya dressed like a cowboy wet dream, tin can?” Jamie asked, ripping open the package with his teeth, biting into the string cheese full on like the heathen he had been declared to be by Hana. 

Genji perked up at that, smirking a little, that look making Jamie nervous. “That’s a roundabout way to give someone a compliment, Junkrat-san.” 

“Oi! Wasn’t a compliment! Just a fact,” he growled, grumpy from the pain, scarfing down the cheese stick. “What, did he kick ya outta bed or something?”

“Jesse and I haven’t had sex in years,” Genji said, voice bland and Jamie  _ hated _ that he gave the cyborg the satisfaction of having inhaled on chewing a stick, coughing in shock. “And I have  _ never _ been kicked out of a bed.” 

“Yer a dirty drongo when your master ain’t tuggin’ your leash, ain’t ya?” Jamie said, getting his breathing under control, absently rubbing at the air near his stump. 

“I’m not into that.”

“Is  _ everything _ sex with ya tonight?” Jamie asked and Genji started to giggle into his palm, the cyborg sliding from the counter to sit at the table with him, every movement effortlessly graceful in the way that jaguars were, like they were confident that nothing in the room could kill them as quickly as they could kill it.

“You’re the one who brought it up,” Genji said, eyes having darted to the air by his stump, tracing the scars in a way that felt like a physical touch. “You are not wearing your arm.”

“Nah,” Jamie said, shoving some chocolate thing that someone had made in his mouth, “it wasn’t comfortable.” He twitched a little as Genji’s eyes didn’t waver. 

“You were also walking strangely.”

“I got a pegleg, mate,” Jamie, waggled said leg in the air, giggling wildly despite the pain that shot through him at the motion, “of course I walk weird.”

Genji simply hummed, sipping his tea, eyes sliding shut. And it gave Jamie a second to...not appreciate the view. That would be gross. Genji was mostly tin can anyway. But he was a striking tin can, all the scars that littered his face, the way that dark green hair brushed over his forehead and his soft expression. Jamie could kind of maybe sort of get how, back when he was all human of course, Genji could have pulled as much tail as everyone said he did. And the whole big shirt thing was kinda cute maybe…

Maybe. 

Genji’s eyes opened and Jamie looked away in a rush, biting into an apple he grabbed, amazed that  _ fruit _ was a  _ thing _ that didn’t try to kill him here. 

“You know,” Genji began, that voice rumbling along quietly, “I couldn’t sleep because my legs were bothering me.”

“Programmin’ glitchin’ on ya, roboboy?” Jamie asked, clicking his tongue. 

“No, I felt my muscles twitching. Which is impossible,” Genji said softly, sipping his tea and looking at the ceiling. “Sometimes I can feel my heart continue to beat even though the artificial replacement doesn’t pump that way. Or I can get an itch even though most of my skin doesn’t get itchy anymore.” He put down the cup, running a finger over the rim of the glass. “It can be frustrating.”

“What makes ya think I care,” Jamie said, leaning over a little, making eye contact, daring Genji to say something. 

“You’re having phantom limb pains,” Genji feared nothing, least of all Jamison Fawkes, “there are ways to take care of it. You do not have to suffer.”

Jamie snorted. “What’s a phantom limb?” he asked, rolling his eyes. “I ain’t haunted by me arm.”

Genji huffed out a soft laugh before reaching forward and touching the air by Jamie’s stump, the sight of the motion making something in Jamie’s mind short circuit. He couldn’t  _ feel _ it, not really, but it seemed to calm down a bit of the pain, just seeing someone else not being able to touch it somehow made it make sense. 

“Our brains,” Genji began, “have a picture of what we look like. When things happen that change that drastically, like losing a limb, sometimes our brains don’t catch up right away. They think it’s still there and when the nerves don’t feel it they go into panic mode.” He tilted his head to the side, smiling a little and Jamie frowned at him. 

“Oh yeah? Ya know about this then, hm?”

“I wasn’t  _ always _ a cyborg,” Genji said simply, “and I...I often get phantom pains. Even now. It can be hard to sleep through a night if I’m stressed, makes my legs feel like they’re on fire even if there’s nothing wrong with them.” He rubbed at his own thigh, drawing Jamie’s attention to the fact that Genji wasn’t wearing pants. But he never wore pants. Bu why did the shirt make it more obvious?

Fuck, off topic. 

Jamie looked down at his pegleg, at the air around his arm and realized he felt...a little better. Understanding how something worked usually made him feel better, made it less mysterious and knowing someone else had been through this, was going through it...it helped in a weird sort of way. 

“So...how do ya deal with it?” Jamie asked, watching as one of Genji’s elegant fingers curled around a cheese stick to steal it, the ninja opening the packaging to pull it apart and eat it. It was kind of mesmerizing to watch. 

“I do other things, or I rub at my limbs just to give into the urge and that can help,” Genji said, “either way, it’s not as bad as it was ten years ago, or five years ago. It will get easier to deal with, Junkrat-san. You just need to be patient.”

“I hate waitin’,” Jamie said with a huff, blushing at the sound of Genji giggling. “Oi, don’t laugh!”

The cyborg smiled at him from behind his hand, a little snort escaping and Jamie hated that it was damned cute. Rust bucket had no right to be cute. “I’m sorry, I wasn’t laughing at you,” Genji said, “I was just laughing at how obvious of a statement that was.” 

Jamie snorted a little before looking away. Well...Genji had a point. He was never going to tell him that, but he definitely had a point. Jamie turned to say something, only to be faced with the soft brush of lips on his cheek and the whisper of fabric as Geni stood to put his tea cup in the sink. The ninja padded across the floor as Jamie stared after him, dumbstruck, cupping his cheek and trying not to watch the sway of his legs. 

“I hope you feel better in the morning, Jamie,” Genji said softly, waving at him before disappearing in a flash of plaid and green, leaving the younger junker to rub at his own skin. 

The warmth lingered there for a while, made Jamie shiver a bit. And then he smiled before standing, leaving the wrappers all over the table. He hobbled back to his room, the pain still in his leg. But it wasn’t as bad anymore. The pain in his arm was mostly gone too. 

Jamie actually ended up sleeping pretty well the rest of the night, dreaming of green explosions and shiny honey-gold eyes.  

 

**Author's Note:**

> Follow my Genji blog at thexdragonxbecomesxme.tumblr.com and ask for commission info!


End file.
